The Story of Carpe Diem

A week ago, I walked into work without a care in the world. My weekend had gone by flawlessly with some snowshoeing, a great run and time spent with my parents.

Before the end of the work day, my boss called me into his office. He told me sales were down and they couldn't afford to keep me on at work anymore so they were going to let me go at the end of the month.

I could feel my face drop. I FAILED.

My boss tried to reassure me that it really was just money issues. I nodded my head and said I had to go because I was late for physical therapy.

As I walked to my car, I called my sister and sobbed for a good thirty seconds, then I hung up the phone, dried my eyes and drove over to physical therapy, holding back the tears and frustration for another hour.

I just could not comprehend the fact that I had lost my job. Growing up, I would hear about my friends' parents losing their jobs and I would think, "Obviously, they weren't doing something right at work." So when I found out I would only have a job for a couple more weeks, I felt ashamed. What had I done wrong? Every task that was given to me, I completed. I answered phone calls with a smile on my face and dealt with irritating customers patiently. How could I be losing my income? What had I done to fail so miserably?

A week has passed and I have had time to talk to my boss and the owner of the company. My thoughts have been verbalized and digested. I was told I did not fail, but honestly, even if I did fail, I know why. I was not passionate about my job. Every day, I did what was required of me then left it all at work and focused on other things outside of the office. That isn't necessarily a bad thing, but a person who loves their job lives their job full-time. When I was an athletic trainer and fitness instructor, my work was where I focused the culmination of my efforts. I loved my job and would work overtime; my work ALWAYS came home with me.

Here is where the problem lies: I have been writing my story every day for the past 26 years. Sometimes it is a story of adventure, love, thrill and hope. Other times, it is a story of activities of daily life that no one really wants to read. If I want a story I am proud of, I should not be wasting my time pursuing a direction that ultimately I do not want.

So it is time to write my story. What is my story going to be? Is there going to be another country involved? Will my family and my best friend be the predominant supporting characters or will I introduce a new setting and cast? This is where I will be focusing my attention for the next couple of weeks until I have a solid outline. I'm thinking maybe Alias or Nancy Drew related themes; that sounds pretty epic. My story doesn't have to be about me though. That is what is so cool about being able to open up a brand new journal and lay fresh ink to it. I am at a phase in my life where nothing (but school loans, of course) are tying me down. This is the time to be selfless and go serve a less fortunate population. Maybe I will help save the sea turtles in Hawaii!

I am excited for this new chapter of my story. Truly, this will be a great adventure. I am in charge of my story, it is just deciding what I will be most proud for others to read.

What about you? Are you writing the story you want other people to read and find inspiration? If not, start redirecting that story. Life is what you make it, so CARPE DIEM.