That's Not Baby Fat...

Yesterday on my lunch break, I swam for over an hour. The first portion was speed skills followed by aerobic endurance. Getting in the water was rough. I stood in Josh's office looking out at the pool making up excuses not to go in. "Ash, just go," he said. So I went. After my warm up and 6x50 "sprints", I swam 45-minutes without stopping. I felt so good during the first 40-minutes of the aerobic endurance. It felt easy and smooth. I practiced all the tips Josh and Austin had given me. The last five minutes were like Chinese water torture. When would it end?! I had to remind myself that it was only 5 more 50's.

That evening I taught circuit class. Oh! I started taking Beta-Alanine yesterday. I had only had one dose, and I'm not sure if it was the pill or the latte from Coffee Bean, but I had so much energy during class! It was an overloaded class with three too few machines and two new people, but I still felt in control and confident. I was using more resistance than I've been able to lately and it actually felt easy! Okay, maybe I was so on fire because I had great people in my class and I knew I was getting sushi after class, but I was just straight out on my game.

This morning I decided to make coffee. Okay, time for the back story... so remember how lethargic I was last Saturday? My mom was a little worried about me, so she sent me this magnificent article by one of my favorite athletes from one of my favorite books!
Check it out: http://www.poweringmuscles.com/index.php
This is the reason I decided to start taking Beta-Alanine. It also made me change my viewpoint on drinking coffee after exercise. Like my mother, I love coffee. True story about my mom: She used to drink 9 white-chocolate mochas a day. No food. MAYBE a salad. No food, just coffee. It was an unhealthy addiction that I did not understand. When I went to the same Bible school she did, I discovered a passion for coffee as well. Now I get her addiction. Usually after my morning workouts, I grab a coffee. It's a great pick-me-up, it tastes delicious and it has milk, so I figured... there's my protein source! However, Matt (the author of our fun little article) says no coffee after working out because it keeps your body stimulated and doesn't allow for a proper recovery. Ohhhhh.... okay. So no coffee AFTER my workouts, what about before? Great. Before my workout it is. Let's go back a little...

This morning I decided to make coffee. I'm steaming my milk and pouring my shot and I realize, "Hmm... I should have left for cycle 3 minutes ago. Also, I did not make a workout for today." Today I'm supposed to work on speed skills and aerobic endurance. I figure I'll wing it. As I enter the building for work, I'm walking down the hall and I see a familiar face. "Wow... that girl looks a lot like my old roommate Jackie," I think to myself. Then she gave me the Jackie wave. I love the Jackie wave. I'm pretty certain I did bunny rabbit hops all the way down that hallway. "Hi! Hi! Hi! What are you doing here!? Hi!" Yeah, I'm a kook. Then I start thinking, "Shoot... Jackie is here for her first cycle class with me. And Rose, Richard and Katrina will be there expecting a gnarly workout. Not to mention all my other 6AM regulars (shout out to Kara, Claire, Tim, Christian, the Johns, etc). I had better think of a good workout stat!" So I give them hell. Zone 5's. Got to love the zone 5's. And they loved it. Thank you, Jackie, for making me push harder, better, stronger, faster!

This morning was three C's, so we grabbed coffee afterward and celebrated Mavel's birthday! Well, I grabbed a recovery drink and baby food. We chatted with Eva, wishing she was there. She would have loved the workout this morning. Then I taught aerobics and balance to older active adults. This is when my knee reminded me that it hates me. "Good morning, knee," I thought. "Grrrrr."

I was having a super fantastic day until the knee kicked in. But I pushed through it. After my classes, I decided to give the knee a break and grab food at Whole Foods. At coffee, Holly had mentioned oatmeal cookies, so I had a craving and that is one of the things I bought at Whole Foods. I ate five cookies as I drove to the beach; I figured I needed some energy. As my legs started to build speed on the warm-up, my knee screamed at me. So I stopped. For the first time since I started training for Wildflower, I stopped. I walked. I called my sister. I called Rachael. I walked. Josh showed up and we walked down to lunch and back. Even walking, I was dying. Why?!?!

My new passion is reading blogs. I'm totally obsessed with Joe Friel, Drea and Robyn's blogs. Joe is a triathlete and coach whom I admire greatly. I am currently following his training program (http://www.joefrielsblog.com/). Drea is a marathoner and fitness instructor who just kicks butt. I wish I was half as cute and bad-A as she is (www.twomotivate.com/). I have admired Robyn since I met her my junior year of high school. She is the most adorable, awesome person you will ever meet. Her blog is also about running (http://runprettyrunfast.com/). So I read these blogs and I start feeling insignificant. Oh man, Drea had a bad day... she could only pump out 20 miles. Robyn felt slow today... she ran a 7:50 mile. Ouch. Surrounding myself with these hardcore people, I start to feel badly about myself. I should be pushing harder. I can't give up. What Would Drea Do? It makes me feel weak. It makes me feel worthless. My laundry is all dirty, so I had to wear these lime green nike shorts that I hate today. I hate my legs, so I hate shorts. So now I feel worthless and fat. I can't run. My shorts are drawing attention to my legs. Ahhhhhh!

Then I look to my left and there's Josh. He's reassuring me, "You're above the average, Ash. Look at the guy that just ran past us; he looked like he was about to die. We don't look like that when we run. And the fact that we race, that puts us well above average. You need to be smart. You need to take a break. Don't run right now. Recovery will put you out for a week, but pushing it and injuring yourself could put you out permanently."

"Thanks, Dad," I respond. Yup, Dad sent me the exact same e-mail yesterday. I'm lucky to have these guys in my life. They care about me. They love me unconditionally and it's awesome!

Josh and I get in our separate cars and he tells me he'll see me back at my place. I'm not sure I want him to come over. My attitude is crummy and I want to take a shower and rest. But I don't say that because I actually do want him to come over. I can't think of anyone else I'd rather be with at that moment. As I drive, I start to pray to God. "Lord, please help my attitude. Help me to listen to my body and to rest. Remind me that it will be better in the end. God, give me a better attitude right now. It's Josh's last day off for a few months and he's choosing to spend it with me. Help me to focus on the good things and not bring him down." It helped to say it all out loud and relax about it. Hopefully, that will carry on throughout my classes tonight! I'm just blessed to have an awesome family, amazing friends and a sensational boyfriend!